Broken Promises by a System-Memoirs of Barry Crouse Part 1


                                   Broken Promises by a System-Memoirs of Barry Crouse Part 1 

             I have decided to write something about my past history regarding a broken system and empty promises.

             The year is 1981. I had graudated from High School and faced new challenges that I was not ready or expected to meet. I applied for financial aide for college and was turned down. They stated My family made to much money despite my father retired from the Navy and worked as a adminstrator for a food company low paying job. My family had 5 of us kids and two parents so this did not make sense at all. I should have gotten this but did not.

           I can remember that I applied for a part time job at UPS working roughly two in the morning to 6:30 in the morning for 10.00 /hour unloading trucks. I can remember sometimes the truck was cold inside 10 degrees and packages exceeded 50 lbs just to give you a idea. The acceptable level was 200 packages per hour in a UPS semi truck on a conveyer belt. I applied at Cuyahoga Community College and paid out of my own pocket for classes I could only afford one class and the book. I also had to pay for my auto Insurance 125.00/per month with paying for gas this made it difficult so I took a second job at Burger King working second shift two jobs.  This eventually all ended and I could not pay for a education on my own without any help nobody including parents.

            I can remember early January 1982 My Dad suggested I join the Military Reserves because they promised to help with the Education paid for and a 2,500.00 bonus. In February 1982 I signed up for the National Guard 12b10 Combat Engineer and I went to boot camp April 1982 in Fort Leonardwood, Missouri. My family came from Missouri Northern Part and I had uncles who lived around Leonardwood or Little Korea. as it use to be named.

          The Drill Sergeants I can remember were tough but fair I can remember that one time when we were running to the mess hall A fellow soldier from Jamica and I were Neck and Neck. He asked me some questions and I told him I use to run the 400 meters he told me he also use to run it. I asked him his time and it was 48 seconds. The climate was dryer for me so my lungs could take in more oxygen because of my asthma. The drill sergeants brought us both in and asked us questions "How come you are Here ?" The person I ran with was a immigrant and it was my turn I told him My family was to poor and I could not get financial aide. The drill sergeants shook their heads in disbelief at both of us.

            On another occassion, I can remember we were marching roughly 12 miles with a 60 pound back pack. I collapsed off on the side and I was taken to the hospital and  had strep throat and given a shot of penicillian on my tush. Some of the Sergeants looked at me in a different way, and looked like they understood what was reality not fiction or made up. I came home and my Dad wanted me to give track another try but after all the heart ache I went through I could no longer bear it anymore so I remember my Dad in 1973 before he went out to sea for one year took me to Billy Jack Films and this was what I reaslly desired I started training in fall 1981 and received my 1st degree August 31, 1988.

            I came home July 1982 and reported to my Unit within 72 hours as instructed. I went to apply for my financial aide and took a bus to Cleveland. I hardly ever went to the city and did not know how to get around so I asked the bus driver and he let me off on E. 35th street and gave me some bad directions next I found myself located next to Public Housing  and the tenants looked at me like I invaded their territory or it might have been because I was White and had my head shaved from the military. I asked them which way to Cleveland State University and they gave me some directions. I eventually found it and completed my enrollment admissions. I had to take another test of exams because my SAT and Army ASVAB test were not considered even though I mentioned it. I was placed in remedial classes so I took the classes and scored well over 95% in Math. I can rememebr having to take one English class over and over again and it looked suspicious because I would complete the test scroing over 90 percent but the final exam I was always under 70 percent ? I can remember that I took two years of Mathematics including all three flavors of Calculus and made A's and B's no C's. I became frustrated at Cleveland State so I enrolled at Cuyahoga Community College and completed my Associates Degree in Data Processing which was really Computer Sciences. The classes I took were Basic, RPG, Cobol one year, Assembler, System Analyst, and mathematics all A's and B's by the way also took probability. I took more classes along the way after I completed my degree 1986 but I was working 3rd shift at night on my own late 1987 - 1990. I can remember one time a Warrant Officer was studying in the same class with me Micro code Architecture. He asked me how come I was getting better grades than him I replied I work with core dumps on IBM maiframes experience. The Warrant Officer was in the same Unit I was in during my miltary service 1982 - 1988 I was a E-4 Enlisted😃

        I can remember from a period of 1984 -1987 worked at a coop job Cleveland State University Offered 30 hours a week after going to college I would come to work for about 4-5 hours. This became tough because I would have to run to Cleveland State and submit my punch cards for my Watfive Fortran Class completing my program assignment. This also occurred in my cobol class and it did not work out my grades suffered in Cobol. The place where I worked was about five blocks from Cleveland State University.

        In this instance, You had a Public Education system that made predeterminations without any considerations examples include running 50-51 second 400 meters in High School winning the High School Checker Championship, Advanced Algerbra 12th Grade A's and B's.  This is what happens to a educational system that has failed in it's resposibility's to tax payers by making pre judgments and not giving Equal Opportunity to others as some have made statements about. A good example My 12th Grade English teacher wrote on my paper Coup De Grace final defeat in French. The teacher said out loud that I would never amount to anything a failure of course the students in the classroom mouth's dropped and for a while this played on my mind. I would say to the 12th Grade English Teacher who is now the success and who is the failure look yourself in the mirror.

         In conclusion , The system may have been kind to others but it was not kind to me  example Some people get their education fully paid for by others and did not have to do anything for it in my case I had to work a part time job to pay for my books and transportation along with Military Service and going to college full time.  What this means to me is a social class system or a caste system becuase My family's Military service is long and extensive many generations mostly were drafted.

       I will write more Memoirs and Journalistic Pieces of Art for more to enjoy 😇 If ou wish to get a better idea of the concepts I am talking about you may want to visit Dynatox Productions on youtube



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